He shiffed on the bed, settling in as if preparing for a long story. Outside, clouds drifted across the moon, casting the room in deeper shadow. In the darkness, Kaius’s voice took on a quality I’d never heard before–softer, more human, tinged with an emotion that might have been sorrow.
“Her name was Celestia, and she was my mate. I did love her, so very much; I was so obsessed with her. I had found her during a trip, and she was… she was different.”
I remained perfectly still, afraid that any movement night break the spell, might make him reconsider sharing this part of himself.
She was so small and delicate; her name was very fitting, and I fell nstantly in love. She ran away that very first day I met her, but I couldn’t let her go. 1 found her; she lived alone in a small house right in the middle of nowhere, but she was no rogue, runaway wolf.”
just a
His voice took on a distant quality, as if he were seeing not the shadows of my bedroom but the memories of a time long past.
“She didn’t seem to like me, though, not one bit, and I wondered if i were the only person feeling the pull from the mate bond. You see, I didn’t see myself as particularly unattractive; I was an Alpha, young, and wealthy. Who doesn’t want that? But she hadn’t wanted me close to her.”
I could picture it clearly–a younger Kalus, proud and confident, confounded by rejection. The image was so at odds with the powerful Alpha I knew that it was almost amusing.
“I never gave up, I visited her as much as I could, and the only person who knew about this was Frost. One day, I asked her why she wouldn’t accept me as a mate. She told me that the only reason she couldn’t be with me was that she didn’t want to make me choose between her and my own pack.”
His hand found mine in the darkness, fingers intertwining with a gentleness I’d rarely experienced from him.
“See, Celestia didn’t want to become a part of this pack–or any pack; she said she liked a free life where she c own, and if I loved her that enough, then I could come along with her.”
be all on her
I tried to imagine Kaius abandoning everything–his pack, his position, his power–for love. The thought seemed impossible, yet the pain in his voice suggested otherwise.
“I loved this pack so much, but… I couldn’t live without her. I hadn’t told anyone but Frost; he was going to cover up for me for the main time, and if I finally chose to be with her, he would became the next Alpha in my stead.”
A piece clicked into place–the unusual bond between Kalus and Frost, their shared secrets, their strange intimacy. It had begun long ago, with this first act of absolute trust.
-The few weeks I spent with her were some of the best moments of my life,” he said softly. “But then one day, just like any other, I woke up to an empty bed.”
His grip on my hand tightened, almost painful, but I didn’t pull away
“At first I thought she might have left early. I found her seated on her favorite couch, facing away from me. Only when I approached did I realize something was terribly wrong. She was completely still unnaturally still.”
Kaius paused, his eyes distant as he continued his story. The moonlight cost shadows across his face, highlighting the sharp angles and hollows.
“She was dead,” he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper. “And in her hands, she held a paper–a message for mo. In it, she explained the true reason she had turned me down earlier, she had wanted me to get close because she knew I would be hart in
I sat perfectly still, afraid to move, to breathe, to do anything that might break th
the spell of his unexpected candor.
“She had this sickness, an issue with her blood; she said it could never be cured,” he continued. “I did notice how thin she got, but every time I asked, she came up with a story, maybe factoring it all stress, and I helloved her.”
His hands clenched into lists, knuckles white with remembered pain. I felt like a foot for not looking deeper. This illness had been eating her out for a while, and that was the reason she settled out alene; she didn’t want to hurt anyone. She said she had been selfish for wanting me and selfish for having me, even if she knew it would leave me broken in the end.”
I thought of the man before me, reserved, strategic, cruel when necessary, and tried to imagine him broken by grief. Something about it didn’t quite fit together, yet the raw emotion in his voice was unmistakable.
“I had been so furious at everything.” Kalus said, his eyes meeting me helefly before shifting away. “At myself for not realizing it soon, at fate for pairing me with her as a mate, and at her for keeping it away from me, maybe I could have helped her if only she told me, we had the best set of healers. Love was pain, and whatever we had was short–lived.”
A single tear escaped before I could stop it, rolling down my cheek. Thrushed it away quickly, not wanting to interrupt him with my
own emotions,
“I couldn’t control my grief,” he continued, seemingly lost in the memory. “I was ready to let go of everything for her; she was had, all I wanted, and then she was gone. I lost myself; I couldn’t control my emotions, and it was turning me into a beast.”
His gaze turned distant again, seeing something beyond the walls of our room. “Frost stepped in. He saved me; he had taken me to spell weaver. I don’t know exactly what she was, but she was more than just a healer; she said the ache I felt was too much to bear and there would be no other way I could recover except the pain could be shared.”
A piece of the puzzle clicked into place–the strange bond between Raius and Frost, the way they seemed to communicate without words, the manner in which Frost had felt Kaius’s pain during the punishment.
“Frost hadn’t hesitated to help, and the spell weaver or whatever she called herself–had gone ahead to perform a Unification Ritual which had only ever been attempted twice in history.”
I couldn’t help myself. “Does Frost regret his decision?”
Kajus shook his head slowly. “But there was more Frost would lose. He would never find his mate, and he would forever share my emotions.
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