Don’t Want to Talk–1
The movie plays on the screen while Zaid’s hand rests on my thigh. He’s rubbing circles into my skin, but all it does is make me annoyed that it’s really the only contact I’ve gotten all day.
I ignore the comments the guys make as they point out the flaws in the movie. Usually I’d join in, but tonight I can’t seem to care.
I’m sitting between Zaid and Aiden, while Jake is on the recliner on his own.
They’ve all been a bit quieter today. Weirdly quiet.
Like I might break if they even look at me too hard. It’s pissing me off.
They’re walking on eggshells. Not flirty. Not playful. No teasing. Like they all know what today is and they think I’m going to shatter any second. Like I haven’t been walking around with this day carved into me every day for the past two years.
I clench the blanket around me tighter, digging my nails into the fabric to keep the sting in my eyes from turning into something worse.
I don’t want to cry. I don’t want to feel it.
When the movie ends, Aiden leans forward to shut the TV off, but I grab the remote first.
“Wait, I’m not tired. I’m going to put something else on,” I say, clicking through the apps to choose another one.
Absolute silence is what I get from them all.
“You guys good with this one?” I ask, my voice flat.
Zaid keeps his eyes on me and nods. Aiden shrugs, even though I can tell he’s tired. His eyes are heavier than usual, and there’s a small line between his brows, like he’s trying not to frown.
Jake says nothing. His gaze just darkens, his nostrils flaring like he’s trying to keep something inside.
Don’t Want to Talk 1
Halfway through the movie, Zaid’s head tilts against the back of the couch, his breathing going soft and even. Not long after, Aiden folds his arms and sinks deeper into the cushions, asleep too.
Jake is still quiet, still unmoving. For a while, I stare at the screen, not really watching. I let my mind go blank because the moment I think, I’ll remember. And I can’t remember.
Not right now.
When the credits roll, I search for another movie without looking at Jake. I figure he’s out cold too, like the other two.
“It’s late, you know.”
I jump from where I’m sitting and look at Jake.
He tilts his head. “Aren’t you tired?”
I still, the remote loose in my hand. My eyes drop to my lap. “If I sleep, I’ll have nightmares, and I don’t want to have nightmares.”
There’s a beat of silence before I hear him shift. “Come here.”
I glance at him, and he’s already sitting up, his arms open.
I don’t hesitate. My body has been craving his touch… any touch.
I crawl off the couch and into his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck as I settle against him. He smells like soap and clean clothes, like he could be someone steady in the middle of all my chaos.
There’s a sadness in his eyes and it just tears me apart. I shake my head, but I don’t speak before he opens his mouth.
“Alina, I’m so sorry-”
“No,” I whisper, tensing. “I don’t want to talk.”
His eyes drop to my lips and he swallows thickly. He kisses me. No hesitation. It’s hard
and deep and real. Like he’s trying to pull me out of myself, like he’s trying to anchor me here, right now.
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Don’t Want to Talk–1
My hands fist in his shirt, and I kiss him back, everything inside me cracking open. It’s
messy and desperate and exactly what I need. I grind into him, causing him to hiss as he pulls away from my lips.
“Alina-”
“Please,” I beg against his lips. “I don’t need you to treat me like I’m fragile.”
His eyes darken. “I didn’t know what you needed from me today.”
I grimace. “You could’ve asked.”
He grabs the hair at the base of my neck and pulls my head back. “What do you need, baby?”
I grab his cock, which has hardened under my thighs. “This.”
His nostrils flare as he looks me over. “Are you sure, baby?”
I nod desperately. “I don’t want to talk, or think, I just want to lose myself.”
He pulls harder on my hair and I whimper. “That I can do for you, baby.”
He slips his hand between my thighs, under my pants, and I gasp, feeling the way his fingers slip from how wet I am.
He frowns at me, lifting an eyebrow. “How are you so wet already?”
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