Chapter 20
In the first moments of waking. Alaric had felt a flash of relief–in this reality, Stella was still alive, not stabbed to death because of his selfishness.
But the very next breath brought crushing realization. She’d vanished somewhere beyond his reach, possibly forever. The pain was physical, like a vise around his chest.
At least dream–Alaric, for all his failures, had actually had Stella by his side for twenty years.
The Alaric of this reality had driven her away completely, perhaps irrevocably.
He clutched his head, each breath a conscious struggle, as though his body had forgotten this basic function.
Seeing him like this, Camilla’s face crumpled with fear. “Alaric! What’s happening? Are you in pain? Should I call the doctor?”
Alaric finally looked up, his eyes bloodshot, voice scraping raw from his throat: “Mom, I think… I’m in love with Stella. I think I always have been.”
As the admission left his lips, something in his chest finally released–a weight he hadn’t known he was carrying
until it was gone.
He was finally facing what he’d been running from for years.
Camilla stared at him for a moment before her own tears spilled over.
“God, I know,” she whispered. “I’ve always known.”
“They say mothers know their children best. I saw it when you were just a boy–the way you looked at her when you thought no one was watching.”
“But for some reason, you kept fighting it so hard. I pushed for this marriage because I saw what you couldn’t admit to yourself.”
Her voice cracked. “Did you really think I’d force my only son to marry someone he didn’t love just because of a promise to my dead friend? What kind of mother would that make me?”
She gripped his hand tighter. “But Alaric, if you loved her all this time, why did you treat her so terribly? Why did you have to push her away until she had nothing left to give you? Why realize it only after she’s gone?”
Alaric stared past her, struck numb by the truth.
He had always prided himself on his insight–his ability to read competitors, to anticipate their strategies, to see through their motivations.
Yet he couldn’t–or wouldn’t–see what was in his own heart.
To Doclaim My Own Life
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Chapter 20
Perhaps it had been nothing more than childish rebellion.
He and Stella had grown up together–genuine childhood sweethearts.
Young Alaric had adored her. When other kids bullied her, he had been her fierce protector.
When she craved a specific treat, he would search every store in town until he found it.
When had everything changed?
It was during his junior year of high school, when Stella lost her mother.
His own mother, Elena’s closest friend, had formally announced their engagement, promising to care for Stella as her daughter–in–law.
That same year, Alaric had been fighting bitterly with his parents over his college plans.
They demanded he study finance to take over the family business.
His passion had been sports–he’d dreamed of pursuing athletics professionally.
He had ultimately surrendered to their wishes, applying to programs that held no interest for him.
But that seed of rebellion had remained, waiting for its moment.
When his parents arranged his marriage too, that simmering resentment finally erupted.
Why should they control not only his career but also who he would spend his life with?
In childish defiance, he had begun treating Stella poorly–as if hurting her somehow struck back at his parents‘
control.
Then, near the end of college, he had met Jenna.
Jenna had been Stella’s complete opposite in every way.
Stella was brilliant; Jenna seemed naive.
Stella was confident and sophisticated; Jenna appeared timid and deferential.
Stella was the untouchable heiress; Jenna was the penniless orphan with nothing.
This stark contrast had drawn him to Jenna, making him increasingly fixated on her.
The more he focused on Jenna, the more he could “prove” that Stella wasn’t his type–that marrying her would be purely his parents‘ imposition.
He hadn’t realized how this twisted logic had trapped him, unconsciously driving him to make devastating choices.
Now he knew that Jenna wasn’t the innocent he’d believed her to be.
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Chapter 20
But even if she had been, he had never truly loved her.
It had been three parts pity and seven parts rebellion–while his heart had always belonged to Stella.
After all, he now controlled most of the Gilbert empire. If he had genuinely wanted to reject Stella, he could have defied his parents completely.
Yet he had clung to the engagement, using “honor” as his excuse. The truth was, he had wanted to marry her all-
along.
But this revelation had come too late,
Beside him, Camilla wiped her eyes. “It’s all too late now. This project will keep her away for over a decade, maybe two. You’ve lost each other.”
Her voice grew resigned. “What’s done is done. Everyone gets their heart broken. You’ll have to let go and find someone new to love.”
Alaric’s entire body tensed as his head snapped up.
“No!” The word burst from him with unexpected force. “I will not let her go.”
