When you love, you love–2
“Lalso erased your back up,” she said, handing me my nose braken memory stick, “Well, all of your backed up
p files anyway.”
“Why would you do that?” I asked.
The smile slipped off her face and she glared at me. “I don’t like you. We’re not friends anymore. We really never were. I only ever indulged you, just like everyone else does for you. The you really think Ethan’s parents want you? Do you think it was on their Things to do before I die list to take care of you?
Tears welled up in my eyes as the stinging bite of words sent chills down my arms, but I choose to focus on what she’d said first. “You can’t just decide on your own, that you aren’t my friend. I understand though. We’re different. So, if it’s what you want I’ll stop trying to talk to you and have lunch with you.”
“I do want! I’ve tried to make it clear for a while now, but I guess you’re too stupid to take a hint! Do you know my friends laugh at you? At the way you dress? God, Goodwill has better clothes than this! As much as she doesn’t want you, I’m sure Ethan’s mother would buy you better clothes. Why do you have to be this way?”
I turned ΠΙ
head away, keeping my eyes glued to the floor. “Okay, Kutie. I’ll stop, but I’ll be there for you if you ever need me.”
“Why would I ever need you? Why would anyone ever need a foster Ed with two sets of dead parents? I just hope Ethan’s aren’t next. Bad luck follows you, so I ask again, why would Lever need you?
Shed walked away. Throughout high school, after that incident, we’d never spoken again unless it was Katie with her friends. deciding to bully me. I always found it weird that the bullying only ever happened when Katie was surrounded by people. One time Katies friends even got violent and punched me a few times. That had been the day I almost gave up on Katie, but the worried look she’d cast back to me spoke volumes. It was enough for me.
And then, in the middle of senior year, I came to school to see images of Katie naked and doing things that I didn’t know where possible. There was a video too. Apparently, she’d gotten too drunk one of her friends parties and a few guys got a little too frisky with her. It pissed her boyfriend off and with the help of her supposed friends,‘ he got the footage from the source and spread it around even more through online social media. I’d never watched that video, but heard she’d been practically passed out for half of it. Katie’s parents had enough evidence, thanks to the rapid spread of the tape, to file numerous lawsuits against the individuals involved, but Katie didn’t want them to do anything, so they dropped them,
She’d been strong for weeks after it had happened, but one day I found Katie sobbing in the bathroom and everything she’d ever done to me, all the cruel things, washed away because it was nothing compared to what she was going through at that monent. I hugged her immediately. She didn’t even put up a fight. I dried her face, gathered her book bag and car keys, and took her home. I stayed with her all day and all night. I even ditched school for the rest of the week so I could be with her. It was like the fight had just drained out of her and all that was left was the cruel reality. The’d been a lot of crying, a lot of eating junk food, rom–com marathons, the usual girl night turned into a week. I would’ve done for a month if I had known, but the school was calling and I couldn’t afford to get hackled by authorities, so I went back. I tried to get her to come with me, but she said she couldn’t face them yet. I didnt see it. She made plans with me to do something after I got out of school too, but when I got back to her house it was empty. Her parents weren’t there, Katie wasn’t there.
Two more weeks passed without contact from Katie or her parents, but her parents showed up uventually. Surfaced and crying at Ithans parents door with a letter to me:
“We figured your’d be bure, Cassie.”
Katie okay?” I asked, not even bothering to
hello.
Katie’s mom shook her head and started sobbing it was her father who answered my question.
“No. She–a–she killed herself,” he said, his voice cracking with grief.
When you love, you love–2
Out of the corner of my eye, heard Ethan’s mom ga was standing at my hack.
and slap a hand over her mouth as she walked towards me and Ethan, who
“When?” I asked the question, but
but I knew the answer. It was the i
alayad gone back to school. The day I’d left her alone.
“Oh Rob, Katie’s mother sobbed. She crumpled into her husband for support before continuing, “two weeks ago.”
They gave me the t
thick envelope th
that contained the very long letter, which had already been opened and probably read by them.
I stared at it dumbfounded, my heart hurting. I never should’ve left her.”
“Cassie, it’s not your fault, Ethan said, his voice wobbling.
I glanced back at him, watching
ng his tears st
tears stream freely down his face
What’s wrong with me?
Why am I not crying too?
Another question I knew the answer too. Katie had told me that day she said she wasn’t my friend anymore. I’m around and as a by–product. I’m used to death. I’m used to death taking away people I love.
bad luck to be
“I still have that letter,” I said to Ethan, wrapping my arms tightly around him as the stark, cold memory of that day drifted away and allowed me to breathe again.
He pushed my hair aside and kissed my neck. “I know you do, I saw when I helped you move into that crappy apartment. I still object to you living there, by the way.”
“Did you read it?” I asked him.
“Did you?” he asked.
I gave a small shrug.
“You need to read it, Cassie. It’s been long enough.”
- Someday,”
“Just not today?
I nodded, and quickly changed the subject, “I love you, Ethan,” I whispered into his chest before pulling away. I could feel my water. “And I think I might be falling in love with Seth. I know it’s only been a little while since we even… well, you know. Anyhow, I
y eyes just want you to know,
Life is too short to not tell the ones you love that you do love them than bringing Katie up–solidified it. I would tell Seth too, oven
“Oh babe, you re already in love with Seth. I saw it the moment you came out of The Coffee Bam wrapped in his jacket. It didn’t take much of a push once we all crossed over that friend line. Really you were already there.”
Seth doesn’t love me thighs, does he?” I asked
I mean sure he loved my body, loved having sex with me… that feeling was entirely mutual, but a romantic love? That type of love probably hadn’t even surfaced with Seth.
When you love, you love–2
Ethan paused and slowly exhated, a frown worrying his brow, “I don’t know.
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