Chapter 39: Back to School
It’s like the world stops. Even the murmuring nearby silences.
I almost start crying immediately when I see Alex step out of the car. Blinded by the fact it’s
him, I immediately walk over, ready to hug him and kiss him and…
Then I take stock of what he looks like, and I pause.
He looks somewhat dead, inside and out.
His hair has grown a tad longer, and it’s unkempt, very unlike the usual suave curls that would push back on his head. He’s wearing a shabby white t–shirt with what looks like a
hole near the collar and jeans with the knees washed out to the point they’re almost white.
Although he still smells like pine, it feels weaker, strained.
He looks closed off. Or maybe ‘shut down‘ would be a better term.
Even so, I’m really happy to see him! I don’t know what happened that he disappeared for a month, but it’s alright. I’ve already forgiven him, and I have a feeling I’ll forgive even more
if he tells me what happened.
I prepare to call out to him as I feel tears building up in my eyes.
But I stop when the passenger door opens.
I’m introduced to a new smell, stronger and clearer than Alex’s pine. It’s like rosehip tea, aromatic without being overpowering, with the somehow wet smell of clean water. I’m not sure what kind of soap this person uses, but maybe they get it from the same place Alex
does.
A girl with short, red pixie cut hair steps out. She seems a tad older, like, maybe by a year or something, with a mature look to her grey eyes. While Alex’s gaze seems to have lost their glow, hers is going strong, vibrant and attractive.
She doesn’t seem like his family. She and Alex don’t look alike the same way Alex and
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Michael do. Is she…is she a cousin?
A friend?
I don’t know, but…
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Discomfort settles in my chest again as Alex approaches. Even if she’s here, I still want to hear from him. I don’t know what’s going on, but I’m not about to jump to conclusions.
He’s heading straight toward me, so I step forward.
“Alex… Alex, what happened? What’sss wrong-”
He steps a bit to the side without looking at me, and without a word, he passes by me.
My heart stops, and a swirl of anxiety starts curling in my chest.
Wh… What was that?
I turn around to look at him, his back and shoulders stiff. But he doesn’t even look back to
see me.
A moment later, the girl also passes me, following after him in her pale jeans, pink shirt, and leather jacket. She glances at me briefly, but then, she ignores me, too.
Alex moves to enter the school, but then he stops and waits. The girl comes up behind him, and once they’re beside each other, she opens the door, and he enters. He doesn’t leave her behind anymore.
And then, it’s just me standing outside
…Seriously, what’s going on??
It’s a few minutes before class. I can’t go and be tormented by this curiosity and hurt. Because it feels like Alex just snubbed me, and I have no idea why he’d do that.
His energy is different now, and that girl seems to match it much more than I do. But even more than that, where has he been? What happened that he disappeared for a month?
#Chapter 39. Back to School
I really don’t understand.
So, I follow after them, entering the school just a few moments later.
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There’s many people in the hallway, doing other things they need to do, like early clubs or chatting. Whatever had occupied them before takes a pause as they stare at Alex and the girl walking beside each other. When they see me trail after them, I feel the observing eyes pierce into my back.
But at this point, I’m getting used to my business being the talk of the school, as though they have nothing better to do. Though, I also know I’d probably be a bit curious myself if I wasn’t the target of these looks.
That doesn’t mean I hate the feeling of being watched any less than before.
Trailing after them, we all head to the administrative office. I try not to enter, waiting outside the door as Alex and the stranger talk to a person at the front desk before they get moved to the principal’s office.
I know I’m acting like a stalker, but… I sneak in the area. If some of the teachers or faculty there see me, they at least don’t indicate that they do, letting me do as I please as long as I’m within reason.
Once they enter and close the door, I go to the wall and stand near the door, waiting. If I press my ear against it like I want to, I’ll probably be escorted out. So, I have to try listening as much as possible without doing that.
I tilt my head toward the door, though not against it. I close my eyes, trying to shut off other senses if it’ll mean my brain focuses as much energy on hearing as possible.
The door is thick, so it’s difficult to hear anything, but words do slightly filter through.
Rita Lock…something. I didn’t catch the end of it. Probably the girl’s name.
Disappeared. Obviously referring to Alex.
Family situation. I could tell it was Rita’s voice saying that. She sounds smooth and is
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definitely older than I am.
Discuss. Clearly, they’re doing that already.
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I try to pick up more words and put context together, but it’s hard to do when my ear isn’t against the door. Still, I’m starting to understand that maybe he didn’t disappear because of the wolf attacks. Which, I’m both grateful for and confused about.
If he wasn’t attacked by a wolf, then what happened that he went ghost for a whole month?
I’m not sure exactly how long I try to listen in, but I hear footsteps approach the door. I slide further to the left to avoid getting hit when the door opens.
When it does, Alex steps out, looking even more gloomy than before, his face resting in a
blank scowl.
After he’s out, the door closes back, and he moves to the main area, slouching into a
visitor’s seat. Immediately, I follow him, settling into the seat beside him.
“Alex?”
He doesn’t even look at me, staring blankly ahead.
“Alex…I’m ssso glad you’rrr–you’re okay.”
“Mmh.”
It’s a shame how much my heart brightens at hearing a response from him. But it’s reassuring. He hears me, and he’s responding, even if just a little bit.
“I jussst… What happened that you disssappeared?”
He doesn’t say anything, his jaw moving slightly as I hear a slight popping sound.
A part of me wants to get angry, but I feel like that won’t be the right response. I don’t know what he’s gone through, and though I tried looking for him, whatever I’m feeling doesn’t make his feelings less legitimate. He clearly seems hurt about something, even if he doesn’t say anything about it.
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“Uhm… Isss it possible to tell me what happened?”
He says nothing.
That anxious feeling coils tighter, making my chest hurt.
“Wherrre were you?”
He shrugs, still not meeting my eyes.
“You don’t know? Do you know that woman?”
“Yeah.”
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It’s the first word he’s said to me since he came back. Hope sparks through my body, and I
lean in toward him.
However, that hope gets replaced quickly when he leans away until I back up.
“I… It’sss okay if you don’t want to talk to me about what’sss been happening. I jussst… I was rrreally worried. I got angrrry when you didn’t show up to the date, but…”
At the mention of Mary’s Garden, he finally, finally, looks at me.
He doesn’t turn his head, but his gaze slides over to me from the floor. There’s a little shift
to his eyebrows, something that my brain desperately interprets as regret. Immediately, I feel like he would’ve shown up if he could, but something kept him from doing that.
I’m not completely out of his heart. He’s just gone through so much, whatever it is, and…
The principal’s office door reopens, the Rita Lock person coming out.
And that spark in his eyes fizzles out immediately, his gaze shifting from me to her so quickly that I feel invisible.
“He said to visit your classes first,” Rita says, crossing her arms. “Come on.”
Alex stands up, ignoring me, as does Rita. They head out of the faculty area, leaving me sitting alone.
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PARRY
My head starts swirling as words become more difficult to process or describe. It’s like a cage is put around my chest, keeping my lungs from expanding enough. It’s harder to breathe.
But even so, I still…
Please.
I just want to know what happened. I want to hear him out.
With my hands clenched in my shirt, I quickly follow after them.
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